Further misadventures in Russian writing
One of the most out-of-touch things a person can say is to begin a complaint with “Back in my day…” and failing to anticipate the obvious reply: “But today is not your day.”
Similarly, I’ve been on the receiving end of “This isn’t America. This is Russia” when I’ve expressed my frustration with some of the academic habits of students here.
While some of that can be chalked up to predictable culture shock, clash, and misunderstanding, that isn’t the case when it comes to good writing.
It’s written simply, for all to see, in black and white (and beige).
On the IELTS, according to the public version of the assessment criteria, a level 9 response “uses cohesion in such a way that it attracts no attention.”
This seems odd, but observe the difference between:
There are three reasons for this. The first reason is…The second reason is…The third reason is…
and
The reasons for this are many. To begin with…Additionally…Furthermore…
Both series of sentence frames are presenting information in a logical sequence, but the first attracts plenty of attention because the sequencing is in your face. It’s repetitive, explicit, and aesthetically, dull.
The second version uses a different word or phrase to further the sequence of reasons for whatever is presented so that the reader isn’t smacked in the forehead before reading each new point.
The next highest band, 8, demands that the essay “sequences information and ideas logically.” I addressed this a bit in my last post, but let’s look at it a bit more closely.
In two essays, the types we call “Discursive” and “Advantages and Disadvantages,” the writer is tasked with presenting two views on an issue and endorsing one (the demand for an endorsement is sometimes only implicit, that is, the assessment criteria demand one but the prompt does not).
Here, I often see students writing something like this:
Some people believe X. Others believe Y. X is correct.
So far, so good.
X is correct for reasons A, B, and C.
Y has its good points, too, consider D, E, and F.
Anyway, X is the best.
W H Y?
It’s completely illogical to make an argument where the final points are AGAINST THE POSITION YOU SUPPORT.
I have likened this to a job interview candidate presenting themself thusly:
I’m highly qualified, motivated, and eager to learn. I also have a bit of a drinking habit. When can I start?
A much more logical sequence in the alphabet soup example shown earlier would be to present your position, present alternatives, then redouble your essay’s efforts towards showing why your point of view is correct, so that the reader leaves with the strongest case for your views.
That’s the purpose of an essay, after all.
